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Editorial: On the Importance of Face-to-face Meetings By Leandro Valdés, director of the Gran Valparaíso, Chile Chapter I began to attend Affirmation meetings about two years ago, in a chapter that covers the central section of Chile. Some 8-10 people attend our chapter meetings, including two women. We currently do not have a permanent place to meet, so we rotate among the houses of members of the chapter. I believe it's very important to have face-to-face meetings; otherwise, our enthusiasm would cool off. When we meet we have a chance to get to know each other, to strengthen each other, and to share our spirituality. We typically meet once a month, but now we're holding Institute classes and meeting weekly. I believe the success of our chapter is due in part to the fact that our chapter has a spiritual facet. As we meet, we feel spiritual closeness. Some of our activities have a spiritual focus, such as family home evenings; and other are purely social, like birthday celebrations. But even when the activities are purely social, we find ourselves sharing something spiritual or talking about some recent personal experience. As Mormons, we have a missionary spirit that will never die. Our chapter has helped promote Affirmation during Gay Pride in Santiago, but I wish we could do more promotion here in Valparaíso. I believe we could help a lot more people, especially young people who feel a burden because of their sexual orientation. Of all the activities that we have had, one of my favorite was when we celebrated Brus's birthday. Some nonmembers came, and I think they were positively impressed by the group. Last Christmas we also had a remarkable activity: we exchanged gifts that came with spiritual thoughts, and we shared a very special moment. One of our best activities took place last February, when we toured the open house for the Santiago Temple, which had recently been remodeled and was awaiting re-dedication. We had a beautiful spiritual experience as we entered the House of the Lord after many years. We felt that the Spirit is with us, that God has not abandoned us, and that we are as worthy of God's love as any other member of the Church.
By Jared Ivie Emily Pearson's last words to her father were, "Good-bye, I Love You." It has been twenty years since Carol Lynn Pearson published her groundbreaking book about her unique and unwavering love for her gay husband who eventually contracted AIDS and came home to die. Since that time, Emily has often been introduced as the daughter of Carol Lynn and Gerald Pearson. Then, roughly fifteen years later, Emily was re-introduced as the ex-wife of Steven Fales, the gay Mormon author and performer of Confessions of a Mormon Boy. Although she has most always been known for the things written and said about her by her parents and her former husband, she has been waiting patiently on the wings and is now standing center stage with a few things to say. As a part of the general session of this year's Affirmation Conference in Portland, we will hear the powerful and touching experience and perspective offered by Emily as she offers her story in her own words. Emily is the mother of two beautiful children, who give a great deal of meaning and purpose to her own journey towards self-awareness and acceptance. She is the author of two children's books, and is currently working on two new books: Dancing with Crazy—a memoir detailing her life thus far; and Kissing the Pink Frog—a book for women currently or formerly married to gay men. Emily is also the co-founder of Wildflowers, a support network for women currently or formerly married to gay men. Most recently, Emily's essay "Irreconcilable Differences" was published in the Sunstone Magazine. The theme of this year's conference aims at giving insight and encouragement to the challenging process of bridging the gap between our relationship to LDS faith and community, and the newly embraced knowledge and acceptance of one's sexual orientation. Emily describes the process of her own journey towards peace as "losing herself in order to find herself". Few people know—as Emily does—the irreconcilable differences between the Mormon Church and being or loving someone gay. Also, in honor of the 20 year anniversary of Good-bye, I Love You, Emily will share from Carol Lynn Pearson's not-yet-released book, No More Goodbyes: Circling the Wagons Around Our Gay Loved Ones. Please join us in Portland this October in celebrating with each other our individual and collective experience as we embrace the healing parts of our pasts with the hope of our futures.
Conference Updates Finding a Roommate If you wish to share a room at the DoubleTree Hotel with another Affirmation member, visit the Roommate Finder at www.affirmation.org/roommate. On that page you may post an entry and read entries posted by others. Conference Packets Have Been Mailed Packets with conference brochures, registration forms, a guide for GLBT visitors, and a refrigerator magnet (yes—the magnets are back!) were mailed two weeks ago to all Affirmation members. If you have not received the packet, that means we do not have your current address. Please notify the (membership  affirmation.org)
so that we may update your record. To download the registration form
from the web, visit www.affirmation.org/conference.
by Olin Thomas Affirmation's Writing Awards will be adopting a different format. After six years of operating as a literary contest with a panel of distinguished judges, for 2006 and beyond a committee will instead select a written work, body of work, film or play to recognize for excellence. Affirmation will continue to use the Writing Awards to acknowledge those whose efforts help educate the community about GLBT Mormon issues and experience. We will recognize works which not only chronicle our experiences, but which have the potential to profoundly impact the LDS community on gay issues. An award may be presented for previously published or produced work and we will also continue to accept material to be considered for awards. Works may be nominated by anyone, submitted by the author or artist, or selected by the committee. We encourage everyone to continue submitting essays, experiences, and articles for potential posting at www.affirmation.org. We read every submission we receive, and we continuously post new entries. Stories and testimonials written in the first person are especially welcome for “Personal Voices,” an area of the website focusing on GLBT Mormon experience. The “Learning Center” contains more educational, less personal articles, organized by topic. We welcome submissions to both these areas of the website. Affirmation is also interested in the creation of brochures or articles that can be used to aid new members and those who turn to Affirmation for help. All submissions will be considered for awards automatically. The 34 entries which received awards and honorable mentions from 2000 to 2005 will be permanently posted at www.affirmation.org/awa. The essays represent the diversity of gay Mormon experience and include the voices of women and men, parents and supporters, the young and the not-so-young, those who live in the U.S. and those who live elsewhere, those barely coming out and those who had accepted themselves many years ago. Affirmation thanks all those who submitted to the contest over the years, sharing their insights about gay Mormon experience. Affirmation wishes to thank the panel of judges, the contest coordinator, the donors, and those who have submitted writing selections over the past six years. We acknowledge the support of those who made the awards possible including the distinguished cadre of judges: Lavina Fielding Anderson, Alan Blodgett, John-Charles Duffy, Cindy LeFevre, D. Michael Quinn, and Kathryn Steffensen. Further information about the new system will be published in upcoming Affinity issues and the new guidelines will be published when they have been completed. We look forward to discovering and recognizing more great essays, articles, films and plays in the coming years.
The following editorial was published in the Salt Lake Tribune by Simon LeVay, a neuroscientist who has written or co-authored eight books, including The Sexual Brain, Queer Science, and the textbook Human Sexuality . In 1991 I published a report in Science that described a difference in brain structure between homosexual and heterosexual men. Although this was not the first biological study of sexual orientation, it drew a great deal of attention both from the general public and within the scientific community. It was followed by a wealth of other studies, and collectively these have greatly strengthened the general conclusion that I drew 15 years ago: Biological factors — including prenatal brain development, hormones and genes — exert a powerful influence on the direction of a person's sexual attractions. The scientific evidence has helped many people view homosexuality and gay people with greater understanding and acceptance, but it has provoked antagonistic responses from those who are heavily invested in the concept of homosexuality as something undesirable or sinful. Among the latter is David Clarke Pruden, director of Evergreen International, an organization that offers religion-based sexual conversion treatment to gay or lesbian Mormons. In a July 8 opinion piece in the Tribune, Pruden presents a wholly misleading account of scientific research in the field of sexual orientation. Pruden grossly misrepresents me as someone who has abandoned or disproved the biological perspective. He quotes me as saying that my 1991 study, by itself, didn't prove whether gay people are "born that way." That's true, but the totality of the available evidence points strongly in that direction. For readers who would like more information about the science, I have posted a detailed review of the biology of sexual orientation on my easily Googled Web site. Employing a turn of phrase calculated to confuse any reader, Pruden writes that a recent genetic study from the University of Illinois "reported that there is no one gay gene." That's correct — it reported evidence for three! How does finding three "gay genes" rather than one show that the born-that-way theory of homosexuality has "no basis in science," as Pruden argues? Pruden also misrepresents the research of psychiatrist Robert Spitzer by reporting that he found a high rate of success among people undergoing conversion treatment. In reality, Spitzer specifically recruited people who claimed to have already successfully completed conversion treatment. Thus, his numbers say nothing about the chances that a gay person contemplating such treatment would end up changing his or her sexual orientation. By all accounts, the chances of "success" — if that is the right word — are far outweighed by the likelihood of experiencing lasting psychological trauma. The American Psychiatric and Psychological Associations have both gone on record as opposing the practice of, and need for, sexual conversion. Evergreen International trumpets the fact that some homosexual people can function in heterosexual marriages, including in the bedroom. But is that so surprising? That's what most gays and lesbians did, after all, back in the days before there was the option of joining an out-of-the-closet gay community. A more relevant question is, why should they feel the need to go back into that dark and painful space? According to Evergreen, homosexuality is incompatible with a Mormon identity, so that gay Mormons must reject either their sexual orientation or their culture and religion. Yet eloquent voices are speaking up in favor of an integration of the two. Here's how Family Fellowship, a Utah-based support group, puts it in its mission statement: "We share our witness that gay and lesbian Mormons can be great blessings in the lives of their families, and that families can be great blessings in the lives of their gay and lesbian members." Affirmation: Gay and Lesbian Mormons P.O. Box 46022 Los Angeles, CA 90046 National Phone Line: (661) 367-2421 To see a directory of current Affirmation chapters, visit www.affirmation.org/chapters Executive Director: Olin Thomas Senior Assistant Director: Alyson Bolles Assistant Director: James Morris Associate Director & Affinity Editor: (affirmationLDS  earthlink.net)
AFFIRMATION GAY & LESBIAN MORMONS is a non-profit support group serving
Gay and Lesbian Mormons, their families and friends since 1977. AFFINITY
is the official publication of the Affirmation National Executive Committee.
(affirmationLDS If you wish to receive a text version of AFFINITY by email, simply (affirmationLDS |
1996-2008 Affirmation: Gay and Lesbian Mormons
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