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By Mark Coberly, Philadelphia Chapter Director
However, in the Fall of 2005, I decided to make an attempt to organize the members that were in the Delaware Valley and attempt to reach out and contact other gay and lesbian Mormons that might not be aware of Affirmation and our presence in Philadelphia and surrounding areas. The first attempt was to determine who in the Delaware Valley had ever registered or showed interest in Affirmation. By working with Olin Thomas, we reviewed the national records and I did get a few names, with whom I made contact. Then it became an issue of updating the information on the Affirmation website with a current Email address and phone number to contact the Philadelphia chapter director. With all this in place we started with a core group of 7 members, plus a couple of their partners. We have had several activities, which have included potluck dinners, going to the movies, rollerblading, and bike riding near the Philadelphia Art Museum. One of our members is an artist, and we had pizza and sodas at his studio and saw much of his art work. We were invited by Temple University to display a table with brochures and pamphlets promoting Affirmation at their annual Gay & Lesbian Coming Out Evening. We also had a booth at the 2006 Philadelphia Gay & Lesbian Pride Festival. Unfortunately we learned that there were not many gay and lesbian Mormons in the area, but we are satisfied to have shared our information with people that were curious about Gay Mormons. We have received emails from people around the world looking to meet other gay and lesbian Mormons, as well as phone messages from individuals in the Philadelphia area and other parts of the country wanting to know more about Affirmation. Although we have not had many activities with the New York City and Washington DC chapters, we hope to change that in the coming months building some bridges and uniting with these other members here on the East Coast.
Millie and Gary Watts will present a workshop at the Annual Affirmation Conference to be held in Portland October 20-22. The parents of a gay son and a lesbian daughter, Gary and Millie Watts are co-chairs of Family Fellowship, a Mormon organization engaged in the cause of strengthening families with homosexual members. Over the years, the Watts have been faithful supporters of Affirmation: Gay and Lesbian Mormons. Open for Affirmation activities, the Watts' home in Provo is a safe haven where gay BYU students and others find support and understanding. For years, Gary and Millie have been active in raising awareness about gay and lesbian issues, especially in Utah and in the Mormon community. "When people ask me what I want for my gay children, I respond: I want them to have the same rights and opportunities as my straight children," wrote Gary in 1998. "The morality of a relationship should be judged on the way the relationship is conducted, not on who is involved in the relationship" (Dialogue: A Journal of Mormon Thought 31:3 [Fall 1998], p. 56).
Author and comedian Laurie Mecham will perform a comedy act during the Affirmation 2006 Conference. Laurie has a background in acting, having performed in the Salt Lake Acting Company and having co-founded the improvisational acting group "Head Games." Laurie has delighted audiences in Mormon forums such as Sunstone and Affirmation for years. Many Affirmation members first met Laurie as she impersonated the hysterically funny Sister Fonda AlaMode—a character she took to the Las Vegas Conference in 1994. In 1996, again as Sister AlaMode, Laurie penned Special Living Lessons for Relief Society Sisters, which soon became a classic of Mormon humor. Sister AlaMode has become an icon for such inspiring thoughts as "The Ward is truly a place of open inquisition," and "Premarital intimacy is foul, filthy, and disgusting and should be saved for the one we love most." Laurie is a columnist for QSaltLake and has two grown-up children "with heterosexual tendencies," as she puts it. She and her wife met in Salt Lake City and married in Provincetown, Massachusetts. They have been living in Portland, Oregon, since 2005.
Conference Registration Still Open If you haven't yet done so, you can still register to attend the Portland Conference. Visit the conference pages to download the registration form. Besides your registration, you will need a hotel room at the DoubleTree Lloyd Center where the Conference will be held. If you want to share a room, visit the roommate finder. Our special room rate ends September 20, so don't delay in booking a room. Women to Hold Saturday Luncheon On Saturday from 1:00 - 2:30 PM Portland Affirmation members Nancy and Susan will be hostessing a luncheon in their home for the women attending the conference. Their home is near the hotel, and carpooling will be available. If you are interested, please at wascocat  comcast.net.
Gamofites to Hold Saturday Luncheon Gamofites (Gay Mormon Fathers) will have their traditional Saturday luncheon at Stanford's Restaurant and Bar near the DoubleTree Hotel on Saturday, October 21, at 1:00 PM. The Michael Farr Award will be given out, and a short discussion will follow. This luncheon requires separate registration. If you're interested in attending this event, please contact at travistruck17 yahoo.com.
Deadline for Nominations for the Mortensen Award Approaching You can still send a nomination for Affirmation's highest honor, the Mortensen Award. The award is presented each year at our annual conference to an individual who has served Affirmation in outstanding leadership and service during the past year. The nominations must be received by September 15, 2006
by Olin Thomas We are now accepting nominations for executive director. The term of office for executive director of Affirmation is one year, running from January 1 to December 31, although it really seems to run from conference to conference. Candidates for executive director are introduced at the conference and they address the attendees, outlining their vision and goals and answering any questions. The position of executive director is the only elected position in Affirmation, outside of individual chapters. The executive director then appoints two assistant directors. These three people form an executive committee that conducts the business of Affirmation. Also appointed by the executive director are associate directors, the treasurer, Affinity editor, webmaster, endowment committee, and a host of special positions such as youth services, women's concerns, and transgender concerns coordinators. The person selected for the position of executive director will greatly influence the performance and direction of Affirmation. Affirmation benefits when we can choose among a variety of candidates who care about moving Affirmation forward. Please do not be deterred by the responsibility of the office. Affirmation does not depend on one person alone; as many executive directors in the past have found, there are many who help. If you would like to be one of those who help Affirmation survive and flourish, also consider offering yourself as a candidate for assistant director or one of the other positions. Many possible future executive directors are out there, waiting for the moment they are ready to take the plunge. Better than diving in the deep end is wading into leadership first. Grow into the role and learn about Affirmation from more experienced leaders by accepting the appointed positions first. If you're interested in accepting a leadership position, please (olin affirmation.org) or a letter:
Affirmation DC Attn: Executive Director P.O. Box 77504 Washington, DC 20013 Candidates must declare their candidacy no later than October 15, but earlier submission is preferable. Only current dues-paying members can run for office. Affinity's editor accepts the nominations. You must submit a full statement of candidacy to Hugo Salinas by October 15, either (AffirmationLDS earthlink.net) or regular mail: Hugo Salinas P.O. Box 46022 Los Angeles, CA 90046-0022 The candidate statements will be published in the November issue of Affinity. Ballots for the election of the executive director will be mailed to all current dues paid members following the Conference and the results will be announced in December.
The collection will help educate families and church leaders by Lisa Hansen Three videos in the series "Understanding Homosexuality" are now available online. The videos were prepared as part of recent sabbatical of Dr. Ron Schow at Idaho State University to educate the LDS community on the subject of homosexuality. Ron and Mike Green are the directors and producers for all three videos. They will be particularly useful in educating the families and church leaders of those who are Mormon and gay. The videos cover three areas of interest: (1) the experience of a young, single, and celibate gay Mormon man, (2) the experience of those who, despite their same-sex orientation, married in the temple and had children, and (3) the dynamics of a family where four of eleven children are gay or lesbian. To see the videos, go to www.ldsresources.info/videos. Affirmation Puebla Launches STDs Awareness Campaign “Our goal is to help the GLBT community increase awareness about condom use and learn more about STDs” by Nelson Cabrera In Affirmation Puebla, Mexico, we launched a "give away a condom" campaign in order to help prevent sexually transmitted diseases. With the support of a health agency, we give away condoms on weekends. Our goal is to help the GLBT community increase awareness about condom use and learn more about STDs. The condom wraps have the logo of Affirmation Puebla and our web address, so as to help promote our webpage and our organization. The first giveaway took place August 12 in Club Cero, in Puebla. We gave away some 300 condoms. Our goal is to give away more than 3,000 condoms monthly in different gay-friendly venues such as coffee houses, clubs, and other places in Puebla. We are also giving away information about STDs via fax and the internet, since there are many people who are still in the closet and prefer to be contacted that way.
It was founded in 1979 by John Larent By Dave Melson Affirmation DC celebrated the 27th anniversary of its founding with a barbeque on Sunday, August 20, at the home of Robert and Lani Graves in rural Virginia. Over thirty members were in attendance. Affirmation DC has met and been active continuously since John Larent founded the chapter in 1979 after reading an article in The Advocate about a new group called Affirmation: Gay Mormons United. Later in 1979, representatives of the Washington D.C., San Francisco, Los Angeles, and Salt Lake City chapters met together to form Affirmation: Gay and Lesbian Mormons.
“Is all this normalcy only an act, a façade covering up repressed desires?” by Seba Martinez An August 4 story in the Salt Lake Tribune focuses on the lives of three LDS men who, despite being gay, chose to marry someone of the opposite sex and be faithful to their wives in order to obey the teachings of the Mormon Church. One of them is Ben Christensen, a BYU graduate who told his girlfriend Jessie he was gay before proposing. Ben recently described his conundrum in an article in the Fall 2005 issue of Dialogue: A Journal of Mormon Thought. "My life is surprisingly typical of a straight Mormon male," writes Christensen. "Is all this normalcy only an act, a façade covering up repressed desires? Maybe. I don't know." What are the odds that these couples like Ben and Jessie will have a happy marriage? Not much, according to research. "It is possible that Ben can achieve a successful marriage, but, unfortunately, the odds are against him… ," wrote Idaho State University professor Ron Schow. Of 136 gay Mormons surveyed by Schow, 36 had tried marriage, but only two remained married at the time of the survey. According to Schow, organizations such as Evergreen International add to the problem of heterosexually married gays and lesbians by making them believe that they can "transition out of homosexuality." According to Schow, there is "a great deal of pressure on LDS men with homosexual attraction to marry heterosexually, with unfortunate outcomes for many of them and their spouses and children." "Some of these couples end up leaving the marriage," adds LDS therapist Marybeth Raynes. "But I would guess that, for most married bisexual, lesbian, and gay people, choosing to leave may well be choosing life—literally and emotionally. As a side note, the high rates of suicidal ideation, attempts, and completed suicides do not end in young adulthood or upon being married." Convinced of the importance of educating LDS Families about homosexuality, Schow and Raynes edited Peculiar People, co-authored A Guide for Latter-day Saint Families Dealing with Homosexual Attraction, and are now posting perspectives by professional and church leaders at www.ldsresources.info. Two LDS women who know intimately the tremendous challenges that mixed-orientation marriages face are Carol Lynn and Emily Pearson, mother and daughter, both of whom ended up divorcing their gay husbands. Carol Lynn has written about her experience in her classic book Good-Bye, I Love You. Emily has written about her experiences in a recent Sunstone article and will address the Affirmation members at the upcoming Affirmation conference in Portland. Two years ago, Carol Lynn Pearson wrote a letter to editor of Sunstone magazine in response to a homophobic letter by Orson Scott Card, who had written that "any homosexual man who can persuade a woman to take him as her husband can avail himself of all the rights of husbandhood under the law." Carol Lynn wrote, "I must respond on behalf of the many thousands of LDS women, including myself and my daughter, who have been the willing, naive sacrifices laid on the altar of false hope built by our church teachings, policies, encouragement and even promises of well-meaning but misguided LDS therapists, bishops, stake presidents and even general authorities." Daughter Emily echoed the same idea in the 2004 Affirmation conference devotional, held at a time of nationwide debate over a proposed constitutional amendment against marriage equality. "My mother and I want to start an organization for the true protection of marriage," said Emily, "for the passage of a constitutional amendment banning marriage between gays and straights."
LDS Publication Acknowledges the Existence of Affirmation “Affirmation continues to the present, holding an annual conference, publishing a newsletter, and sponsoring social and spiritual events” by Matt Christensen For the first time ever, a volume published by Deseret Book acknowledges the existence of Affirmation: Gay and Lesbian Mormons. Edward L. Kimball is the author of Lengthen Your Stride: The Presidency of Spencer W. Kimball (Salt Lake City, UT: Deseret Book, 2005) and a son of the late President Kimball. In a section detailing the anti-gay rhetoric and actions of President Kimball, Edward Kimball notes: In 1977, too, Mormon gays and lesbians began to publicize their views that homosexuality is not "curable" and that homosexual acts based on "mature loving intimacy" should be accepted as essential to the development of an unfractured personality. They organized Affirmation, a support group that soon had chapters in most of the nation's large cities" (page 87).In a footnote, Edward Kimball further notes that "Affirmation continues to the present, holding an annual conference, publishing a newsletter, and sponsoring social and spiritual events." We are glad Edward Kimball had the courage to admit that Affirmation exists. The next step would be for LDS leaders to stop using silly euphemisms and vague circumlocutions and call us what we are: gay and lesbian Mormons. Affirmation: Gay and Lesbian Mormons P.O. Box 46022 Los Angeles, CA 90046 National Phone Line: (661) 367-2421 To see a directory of current Affirmation chapters, visit www.affirmation.org/chapters Executive Director: Olin Thomas Senior Assistant Director: Alyson Bolles Assistant Director: James Morris Associate Director & Affinity Editor: (affirmationLDS  earthlink.net)
AFFIRMATION GAY & LESBIAN MORMONS is a non-profit support group serving
Gay and Lesbian Mormons, their families and friends since 1977. AFFINITY
is the official publication of the Affirmation National Executive Committee.
(affirmationLDS If you wish to receive a text version of AFFINITY by email, simply (affirmationLDS |
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