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Conferences Have Enriched My Life—And They Can Enrich Yours by Olin Thomas, Executive Director The annual Affirmation conference is right around the corner. For me, this is one of the highlights of the year. After having attended thirteen of the last fourteen conferences, I have learned that they are wonderful, sometimes magical, experiences. When I first joined Affirmation (way back in the late 1980's), I didn't even consider going to the conferences. I lived on the East Coast — it was too long of a trip and too expensive. Maybe you are thinking the same thoughts about traveling to the East Coast this year. I didn't have the disposable income or the vacation time, I reasoned. However, in 1993 my partner died, living me alone and very, very lonely. I decided to go the 1993 Conference in San Diego to get away for a few days. I expected to enjoy myself, but I did not expect to meet so many wonderful people, many of whom I still know to this day. I did not expect to be moved to tears in more than one event. I found laughter, comfort and spirituality — so much that I pledged to never miss Conference again. I have only missed one since — in 2001 — the unfortunate side effect trying unsuccessfully to fly out of Washington two days after 9-11. In subsequent years I have found new friends, new experiences, cultural enlightenment, and even a bit of romance at conference. I have meet celebrities big and small. And at every conference I have been deeply moved at least once. There is still time to get reasonably priced airline reservations. Hotel rooms are running out: it is best to get one now! You can make the trip with only one or two days of vacation time, if that is a concern. There is magic at Conference, if you are open to it. My budget has survived as well, because the registrations have been amazingly reasonable compared to other types of conferences or recreation, and room sharing has become a way to meet new friends, as well as to save money. The Affirmation members in the Washington, D.C. chapter have been fund-raising for the past year (yard sales, special donations, picture framing, and selling books) to keep the registration low so the greatest number of people could afford to come. The events and people at the conference have appealed both to the vestiges of my Mormon self and to the part of me that is comfortable and even proud of being gay. Ideas and examples are presented each year that stretch my mind and make me really think about my positions in life, whether that is spiritually, politically or ethically. Often people will tell me that they don't “need” Affirmation or the conference. My answer to them is that I don't need it either, I want it. The experiences I have in Affirmation add to my life and make it so much richer. Now, both my partner and my employer know that I must have a few days off whenever Conference is planned — it's my first priority. It's the best spent two or three days of vacation (one day will do it in some cases) I take all year. I can't promise that you will have the same experiences I do — but I can promise you will have your own incredible experiences, if you just come and open your heart and mind and join in the camaraderie of Affirmation Conference. Your presence will add so much to the experience. It’s just a three day weekend of your time, but it will seem like a much larger experience. Be part of the magic and create your own memories at the 2007 Conference!
DC Conference: Procrastination Could Be Expensive! It is costing you money everyday that you delay in signing up for the 2007 Affirmation Conference in Washington, D.C. Conference fees go up on September 1, and hotel room rates are rising daily as hotels with available rooms disappear. With the most impressive list of speakers we have seen at an Affirmation Conference, and the 30th anniversary of the founding of Affirmation, attendance is exceeding expectations. Please do not miss this event. If your conference registration is postmarked by August 31, your registration fee is only $159 ($139 if this is your first conference or if you are a student or unemployed). September 1st, the fee goes to $179, and after September 20, you will be paying $199. Conference registration forms and hotel information are available at www.affirmation.org/conference. Irwin Phelps scholarships are also still available for a limited time to help with your conference expense if needed. The conference committee is reporting that there is a shortage of hotel rooms in Washington. Affirmation contracted for a sizable block of rooms at the conference hotel, the Hyatt Regency on Capitol Hill , and we have since increased the size of that room block more than once, but the number of people coming to this October’s conference has been higher than expected. We have a few rooms still available at $219 per night for Affirmation members ($289 to $689 to the public), but these will be gone before the end of August. We recommend the Hotel George (right around the corner from the Hyatt), the Holiday Inn on the Hill (directly across the street), and the Washington Court Hotel (one block down). Each of these hotels had rooms available as of August 20 starting at $189 per night. We also suggest that you check sites such as Orbitz or Travelocity; they often have blocks of rooms available at below market prices. Look for a hotel either on Capitol Hill or near a Metro station. And don’t forget the Roommate Finder on this site – we have several people with rooms looking for someone willing to share a room and expenses. Please make your reservations as soon as possible. After Labor Day, if you can find a room you can expect to pay between $300 and $1,600 per night. Multiple sources have told us that most hotels in the District of Columbia will be full in October. We apologize for the inconvenience, but we hope that we have come up with a good enough conference program that you will feel that it was worthwhile. We have a group of speakers that is beyond anything that you have seen before – Gene Robinson, Carol Lynn Pearson, Jonathan Rauch, Harry Knox, Matt Foreman, Bill Russell, the 2007 LDS Soulforce Riders, Will Gartshore, Steven Fales, Buck Jeppson, Brent Parson, Lani Graves, a Special Appearance by the D.C. Cowboys Dance Company, and others. The host chapter, Washington, D.C., has raised several thousand dollars, and other Affirmation members from around the country have sent contributions, to defray the conference expense and keep your conference fee as low as possible. We look forward to seeing you in the District of Columbia on October 5! Call for Nominations for National Executive Director by Olin Thomas We are now accepting nominations for the position of executive director. The term of office for executive director of Affirmation is one year, running from January 1 to December 31. Candidates for executive director are introduced at the conference and they address the attendees, outlining their vision and goals and answering any questions. The position of executive director is the only elected position in Affirmation, outside of individual chapters. The executive director appoints two assistant directors and these three people form an executive committee that conducts the business of Affirmation. Also appointed by the executive director are associate directors, the treasurer, Affinity editor, webmaster, endowment committee, and a host of special positions such as youth services, women's concerns, and transgender concerns coordinators. The person selected for the position of executive director will greatly influence the performance and direction of Affirmation. Affirmation benefits when we can choose among a variety of candidates who care about moving Affirmation forward. Please do not be deterred by the responsibility of the office. Affirmation does not depend on one person alone; as many executive directors in the past have found, there are many who help. If you would like to be one of those who help Affirmation survive and flourish, also consider offering yourself as a candidate for assistant director or one of the other positions. Many possible future executive directors are out there, waiting for the moment they are ready to take the plunge. Grow into the role and learn about Affirmation from more experienced leaders by accepting the appointed positions first. If you're interested in accepting a leadership position, please send me an email (www.affirmation.org/contact/ex_dir) or telephone me at 703-864-5527. It is my intention to leave the post of executive director after the 2008 term, assuming I am re-elected. Therefore, this upcoming term would be your best chance to merge into the leadership track. If you are interested, now is the time to take the plunge. Candidates must declare their candidacy no later than October 5, but earlier submission is preferable. Only current dues-paying members can run for office. Affinity's editor accepts the nominations. You must submit a full statement of candidacy to Hugo Salinas by October 5, either by email (www.affirmation.org/contact/webmaster) or regular mail: Hugo Salinas P.O. Box 46022 Los Angeles, CA 90046-0022 The candidate statements will be published in the November issue of Affinity. Ballots for the election of the executive director will be mailed to all current dues paid members following the Conference and the results will be announced in December. Affirmation Members Invited to Leadership Meeting by Olin Thomas All Affirmation members are invited to attend the annual Affirmation Leadership Meeting, officially known as the Council of Chapter Representatives, to be held on Friday, October 5, at 2:00 pm at the Hyatt Regency Washington on Capitol Hill. This meeting is open to all Affirmation members. In addition to that, all Affirmation chapters are required to send one official representative. If you haven't yet bought your plane ticket, plan your flight to arrive early enough to attend. Should you arrive late, please drop in for as much of the meeting as you can. Several Affirmation officers will present concise reports on the state of Affirmation. We will also discuss locations and dates for upcoming conferences. Attending this meeting is a great way to meet the current leadership of Affirmation, to get a sense of Affirmation's direction, and to contribute your views. I will keep the meeting strictly on topic and on schedule. Join us from 2:00 to 4:00 pm on Friday for this important session! The exact room we will meet in will be announced later, as the hotel tends to rearrange rooms in order to meet last minute needs. Send Your Nomination for the Mortensen Award It is time to call for nominations for Affirmation's highest honor, the Mortensen Award. The award is presented each year at our annual conference to an individual who has served Affirmation in outstanding leadership and service during the past year. The nominations must be received by September 10, 2007—no exceptions! E-mail them to the Mortensen Awards Committee. Do not submit just a name. We need to know something about the individual since the committee may not know him/her well. For a full description, please visit www.affirmation.org/news/2007_062.shtml.
“This publication does not reflect any substantive change in policy or position” From QSaltLake. Posted with permission. © QSaltLake A new pamphlet about homosexuality and the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints appeared on the church’s Web site in late July. Titled “God Loveth His Children,” the 2,500-word document reiterated several of the church’s previous statements about homosexuality, including the difference between same-sex attractions (which it considers not sinful) and acting on those attractions, and incompatibility of same-sex relationships with God’s plan for families in the afterlife. At the same time, the pamphlet states that the church does not know what causes same-sex attractions, but that sexual abuse and sexual experimentation in childhood aren’t responsible. It acknowledges that homosexuality includes “deep emotional, social and physical feelings.” Above all, it stresses that same-sex attracted Mormons should remain active in the church and that straight members should treat them with love and respect. However, the pamphlet also implies that gay and lesbian members should not “flaunt” their orientation. And while it states that not all gays are able to change their orientation, it labels as “helpful” seeking “guidance from professional counselors” whose counsel on same-sex attraction “is consistent with gospel teachings.” “In some circumstances a person defers marriage because he or she is not presently attracted to a member of the opposite gender,” one passage from the pamphlet reads. “While many Latter-day Saints, through individual effort, the exercise of faith and reliance upon the enabling power of the Atonement, overcome same-gender attraction in mortality, others may not be free of this challenge in this life. However, the perfect plan of our Father in Heaven makes provision for individuals who seek to keep His commandments but who, through no fault of their own, do not have an eternal marriage in mortal life. As we follow Heavenly Father’s plan, our bodies, feelings and desires will be perfected in the next life so that every one of God’s children may find joy in a family consisting of a husband, a wife and children.” Passages such as these worry critics like Gary Watts who, with wife Mildred, co-chaired the gay Mormon support group Family Fellowship for several years. “If I’m a gay guy who’s struggled for 10 years to change and can’t, I’m going to ask: what’s wrong with me?” Watts told the Salt Lake Tribune. Affirmation Gay and Lesbian Mormons welcomed what they called a “softening” of the church’s position in “God Loveth His Children,” which is gentler in its treatment of gays and lesbians than previous publications which often equated gay sex with murder and drug addiction. Still, executive director Olin Thomas said that Mormon leadership still had a long way to go in welcoming gays and lesbians as full members. “While Affirmation welcomes any softening of the church’s position on this matter, this publication does not reflect any substantive change in policy or position,” he said. “The only option for gays and lesbians is a life of solitary chastity. I do not believe that the Creator would expect this of anyone. Church leadership has not yet announced how the new pamphlet will be used. A spokesman for the church has declined to comment on reports that copies of “God Loveth His Children” are being sent to Mormon bishops. Documentary Features Gay-Supportive Mormon Family “He had every reason to believe hat something bad could happen to him too, and yet he loved us enough to take a chance”
“I was afraid of disappointing my parents probably the most,” says Robert Jr. about the experience of coming out to his parents. “My dad and I had kind of a difficult relationship at times, and I did fear what my dad's reaction might be.” According to Lani, when a child comes out “you begin thinking of all the dreams you dreamed for your child, and this was not one of your dreams--this was not in the plan of life you had hoped for for your child.” “[Our son] had every reason to think that we might do what others parents had done, which is to say to your child, ‘You no longer live here, you're no longer our son,’” said Lani. “He had every reason to believe that something bad could happen to him too, and yet he loved us enough to take a chance.” To see a preview and purchase a copy, visit www.AnyoneAndEveryone.com.
“I love the Mormon community and I have a unique opportunity to build bridges” Author Carol Lynn Pearson, whose play Facing East is being staged in San Francisco through August 26, was featured August 18 in the San Francisco Chronicle. Facing East explores how the suicide of a gay young man affects his LDS family. “I love the Mormon community,” Pearson said, “and I have a unique opportunity to build bridges.” Pearson told the Chronicle that a number of local LDS leaders attended the opening of Facing East in San Francisco.“They've been nothing but supportive,” she said. “I believe the Mormon heart is a good heart. I feel comfortable with my role in the Mormon church.” The article notices that Mormon-dominated Utah has the highest suicide rates in the country for males ages 15-24. “I'm not an artist's artist,” Pearson said about her efforts to raise awareness about suicide in the gay Mormon community and her own sense of mission. “Issues are more important to me than art itself.” Pearson will be one of the speakers at the upcoming Affirmation Conference in Washington DC, where she will also sign copies of her recent book. No More Goodbyes: Circling the Wagons around Our Gay Loved Ones.
Along with some seven other GLBT organizations, Affirmation Chile has helped found the Chilean Federation of Sexual Diversity (FEDISECH in the Spanish acronym). Several gay and lesbian Mormons attended the First National Gathering of Sexual Minorities, where the new organization was created. The Federation’s mission is “to help eradicate discrimination based on sexual orientation or gender identification in all social, political, cultural, and economic spheres” and “to strengthen and promote networking between human rights organization and the society at large.” More information about the new organization is available on its website at www.minoriassexuales.cl. Mike Green & Scott R. Mills to Tie the Knot Congratulations, Mike & Scott!
The program, “A Celebration of Love,” will feature vocal artists Connie Roberts and Seth Kershisnik, Mark Packer, Patrick Angell, violin Emil Pohlig, flute the Salt Lake Men’s Choir and the piano duets of Mike and Scott. Reception to follow. All are welcome. No gifts please. Other Stories Recently Posted at www.affirmation.org Salt Lake City Workshops to Focus on Skills, Knowledge, and Relationships www.affirmation.org/news/2007_086.shtml U.S. Senator Pleads Guilty to Lewd Act, Resigns from Romney’s Campaign www.affirmation.org/news/2007_088.shtml Conference FAQs www.affirmation.org/news/2007_090.shtml The Affirmation Conference Is Just Days Away www.affirmation.org/news/2007_091.shtml Affirmation: Gay and Lesbian Mormons P.O. Box 46022 Los Angeles, CA 90046 National Phone Line: (661) 367-2421 To see a directory of current Affirmation chapters, visit www.affirmation.org/chapters Executive Director: Olin Thomas Senior Assistant Director: Alyson Bolles Assistant Director: James Morris Associate Director & Affinity Editor: www.affirmation.org/contact/affinity Send Us Your Submission! AFFIRMATION GAY & LESBIAN MORMONS is a non-profit support group serving Gay and Lesbian Mormons, their families and friends since 1977. AFFINITY is the official publication of the Affirmation National Executive Committee. Submissions are welcome and should be limited to 250 words. To contact us, visit www.affirmation.org/contact/affinity. The opinions expressed herein do not necessarily reflect those of the editors, national committee or publisher, but rather the individual writers. The Editor reserves the right to edit any material deemed offensive, libelous, grammatically incorrect or lengthy. About AFFINITY and E-AFFINITY AFFINITY is available both as an email text and as a web-based document. Although both versions are free of charge, we encourage you to become a dues-paying member and thus help us advance Affirmation's important mission. If you wish to receive a text version of AFFINITY by email, simply (affirmationLDS  earthlink.net). If you are a dues-paying member and do not have Internet
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